February 2012
4 posts
Rumours currently circulating about Lana Del Ray:
She has had so much plastic surgery and liposuction as to render her unrecognisable from her previous appearance.
Her first album, released under the name Lizzy Borden, was not received well by the pop crowd for being too ‘metal’.
She is solely responsible for the cancellation of Deadwood, Arrested Development, & Twin Peaks.
She had something to do with Madonna at the...
January 2012
26 posts
1 tag
losing interest in 'the happiness project'...
after realising i can’t relate to a totally ambitious, competitive and motivated person.
luckily, I’m spiteful:
“I’LL BECOME HAPPIER WITHOUT YOUR HELP, GRETCHEN RUB-IT-IN.”
whilst leaving the brunno...
A: “Marty what are you doing?”
M: “I’ve just been chilling with my new friend Zoe. Seeya Zoe!”
Z: “ARGHH SHUTTUPPPP.”
M: “Happy New Year!”
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whilst walking into rics...
“DON’T THESE PEOPLE KNOW WHO I USED TO THINK I WAS?”
Lavina, 2012
1 tag
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only drug dealers and property developers answer the phone by just saying ‘yep.’
ah piss i meant to do that privately.
reallyreallyreallytrying asked: Absolutely
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1 more week in brisbane
i cannot wait to fucking pimp our new apartment.
2012 is the year of making it rain, acting like you have bank, and for me, being the cleanest, most adult myself ever.
i bought ‘the happiness project’ today after reading the beginning at a friends house yesterday, so i guess 23 is the age when you start buying self-help books
i definitely want to live in this city again. i never...
December 2011
6 posts
BOYCOTT RACIST CABDRIVERS
i just got in a cab and the driver was lamenting the lack of fares due to driving competition: ‘if all the indians went home for christmas they wouldnt get back in thanks to kevin rudds law’.
so when i stopped at the servo to change my $100 dollar bill (christmas moneys) i requested a new cab with a driver ‘who isn’t a racist fuckwit’.
got driven home by somalian...
1 tag
October 2011
66 posts
tumblr gives a whole new meaning to dashboard...
(it’s a big night for punk/emo/hardcore jokes on my blog)
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sunday afternoon...
tom, wie gehts, and me are sitting in the lounge listening to megan fox fanfic. they only just starting sexing and its been on for like half an hour.
american pillowcases are idiots.